you asked for it, you got it. the chicken poem. in its original form.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

The chicken crossed the road one day
It was an ugly site
For when he got to the other side
He had a terrible fright

Forgotten was his pass
To keep him from being dinner
Maybe nobody’d eat him
If he was a little thinner

He had the perfect life
As the perfect form of poultry
He had a lot to live for,
His hen was awfully sultry

He didn’t want to be eaten for lunch
So he crossed the road again
And all the way across the road
He thought about his pregnant hen

Yes, she was due to lay some eggs
They were going to be twins
And then all of a sudden from nowhere
came a Mercedes Benz

And when that chicken saw the car
He almost had a cow
Then that lovely Mercedes symbol
Hit him right in the beak KAPOW!

And splattered all over
On route sixty-six
With his hen giving birth
To a couple of chicks

Was Charles the rooster
All silent and flat
Soon to be dinner
To a thin alley cat

So now Charles is dead
His hen all alone
While the alley cat picks
The meat off a bone

The moral of this story
To me is really quite plain
Look both ways before you cross
Or expect a buttload of pain

Like Charles the rooster
All silent and flat
Soon to be fried
For a fat lady that

Went to KFC
For an extra crispy breast
Instead she got Charles the rooster
And of course you know the rest

That fat lady went home
And sat down to her table
And so this concludes
Our noteworthy fable.

By: Spiff S. Mann
December 17, 1995